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I'm Firing My GPS! (edit/delete)

I have a love/hate relationship with my GPS.  I'm thrilled to have it, and it has gotten me to many locations I was totally clueless about.  But, then again, it has  taken down roads that were no where near my destination.  Sometimes it has led me to places I have been totally unfamiliar with.  So, you see my love/hate situation.

My GPS has multiple voices.  After listening to each one, I picked Mandy.  Mandy has a lovely British voice that is sometimes a little more formal than most of my driving warrants, but she was better than some of the other choices.  After a few mishaps with Mandy I thought "I need a new GPS.  Better yet, I need a new GPS voice." I brought this up to my wife and that launched a long brainstorming session of potential new voice candidates.  Here's a sample of our list:

• Mr. T - "I pity the fool that doesn't turn right!"

• What about Dr. Phil -  "Alright, so your life is on a straight path, but you've got to turn right up here.  How's that make you feel?  Turn right!  OK, you didn't turn right.  You're going the wrong way.  You know that don't you? You do? Well, how's that working for you?
• Paula Dean - "Hey, y'all . . . we're fixin' to turn right just up ahead there, so keep your eyes open . . . "
• Farmer, "Go to the oak tree on the south-side of the 'Y' up there. Turn right at the new fence posts.  You know, since that city slicker ran through the fence last September that fence has been down.  Don't know why it's taking so long to get it fixed.  Do they think the cows are gonna stay in there because they're loyal?"
• Mushmouth (from Fat Albert) "Hey-ba man-ba turnin' rightca up here . . . man ba.
• Jack Bauer (24) - "I Know this is a lot to deal with right now, but you have to focus.  There's a right turn up ahead.  You need to take that.  When you get to the corner, turn right and keep going.  Don't look back!"
• Clint Eastwood - "There's a right turn up ahead, so you have to ask yourself.  Do you feel lucky?  Well, do ya, punk? Take the turn.  Go head.  Make my day!"
• Ozzy Osbourne - "Mumble, mumble, mumble, mumble . . . SHARON!  You missed the blooming turn again."

Well, you get the idea.  As an independent realtor, I need good directions to make my work flow smoothly.  My GPS has been an essential part of that work flow, but if it's going to keep getting me lost I'll settle for an entertaining voice.  Mandy, your days may be numbered.  Who's on your list?

Here's Your $4.00 Fine! Now stop that! (edit/delete)

The local paper in Winchester does an interesting page every Monday.  On Monday they publish articles from 100 years ago, 75 years ago, 50 years ago and 25 years ago.  I'm always most fascinated with the 100 years ago.  Since I wasn't here to remember them they tend to be the most enlightening and entertaining.

This past Monday the first story was my favorite.  It seems that the postmaster had complained to the local city government that too many men were spitting tobbaco on the floor.  There were spitoons all around, but these uncouth city slickers had taken to spitting wherever and whenever they wanted, and since the postmaster was also the custodian of the post office this had to stop!  Besides, it was a health issue.

Local laws had to be amended to make spitting on the floor of the post office a fineable offense.  It could cost up to $4 if the offense was severe enough, and in 1901 $4 was a lot of money.  Well, the story got me thinking.  What would I fine people for if I could stick a $4 fine on offenders?  Here's a partial list:

• Wearing pajamas anywhere but in your home - cha-ching!  $4.00 please
• Non-handicapped parking in handicapped only slots - cha-ching!  $4.00
• Sitting right beside my table in a completely empty resturaunt - Cha-ching!  Move over.  Leave your $4.00 on the table!
  
• Wearing too much cologne anywhere - teary-eyed, sneezing cha-ching!
  
• Driving 10 miles under the speed limit in the passing lane - cha-ching, cha-ching!
• Talking loudly on your cell phone - we all have them - nobody is impressed - cha-ching!  Hand over the $4.00 and use inside voices!
• Trying to impress me with your intellect while using bad grammer - cha-ching!  That should be $8.00, but I did set a $4.00 limit.  Your lucky day Sparky!
  
• Not returning important phone calls, emails or text messages - cha-ching!  Ante up, $4.00.
• Playing your music so loud in traffic that my car vibrates - cha-ccchhhhiiinnnnggggg!
  
• Chewing with your mouth open - cha-ching!  What was that?  $4.00, spit it up!
  
• Butting in line anywhere - cha-ching!  Back to the end of the line Bub.  Oh yeah,  $4.00 please.

You see my dilemma.  There are just to many things to fine people $4.00 over.  Of course we could use these fines to settle the national debt.  What do you think, two weekends?  We should be there in two weekends, maybe three.  Anyway, what's on your $4.00 fine list?  I may need to take out a loan if this ever becomes law!

A Diamond in the Rough and a Labor of Love (edit/delete)

Every once in a while you find a diamond in the rough.  Last summer a good friend called to see if I would help him bring an old distressed Victorian back to life.  I'm always up for a challenge, so we met up and surveyed the property.  Whew!  Distressed was an understatement.  He had already cut all of the overgrowth away from the house so you could actually see it, and I'm not 100% sure why he didn't leave right then.

Removing all the trees around the house gave an amazing view of a house that had been idle for 12+ years.  Windows were broken out, the porches were falling down on both front and back sides of the house, the roof leaked, birds lived in the attic, and that was just the beginning.

Inside wasn't any better.  The first floor bathroom was missing its floor.  Rain, snow and birds had been passing through the second story windows for years, and they had left their mark.  The walls and ceilings were crumbling throughout, and those were the good features.  But, there was something about that house that had us intrigued.

Strother Adams is a craftsman.  Strother and his brother Davey have rescued more than one structure, and this was surely to be a test beyond most.  For months after that, Davey scraped paint, fixed windows, repaired doors, repaired plaster, built bathrooms with floors, sealed up leaks and did a hundred things I never saw him do.  Strother coordinated plumbers, HVAC contractors, insulators, roofers and others.  My electrical company went in and made the old wiring safe while replacing the majority of it with new 21st century circuitry. 

The kitchen was completely replaced, one bathroom was restored, one more was added and one was cleaned up.  The floors were sanded, plaster finished and walls painted, new trim installed or old trim repaired.  New plumbing and a heating/cooling system was installed, and finally it was finished. 

This ugly duckling had become a beautiful swan.  We had more fun with this property than most we work with.  It had nooks and crannies that most houses don't have.  You could sense little children hiding in the voids between the walls, and you could see a level of 19th century craftsmanship that rivals the best craftsmen of our day.

I love the whole process of buying and selling real estate, but every once in a while a house comes along that begs for a second chance.  I know as realtors, we are in the market to help others buy or sell homes, and that is exciting.  But, I also have the good fortune to be an electrical contractor.  When a diamond in the rough comes along like this one, I often get to be a part of its rebirth.  Then, the buying and selling becomes a second thought, an end result. 

The real joy in finding a house like this is seeing it rise from the dust of blight and decay to become a fully restored home where a family will live and kids will grow, songs will be sung and meals will be shared.  People will fall in love with all of its vintage 1800s features while enjoying the comforts of our upgrades, and they won't be inconvenienced by outdated wiring, plumbing, heating and cooling systems.  No, they will be free to enjoy a piece of history.  They can absorb its strength that helped it survive the ravages of time, and they will sense the families that once walked through its hallways.  It is a diamond in the rough, and what a diamond it is!

Double-Check Everything!  

 

Here's the odd part.  Both the buyer and I had double-checked every form online.  Every form had the appropriate checks and other data.  But, when we printed them out they were slightly different.  There weren't any major changes, but there were a number of odd minor changes.  In our haste to get the offer to the listing agent's client we simply accepted what we could see online and printed, signed and initialled. 

The moral of the story?  Double-triple-quaddrupple check everything.  It didn't hurt anything this time, but it did reveal a problem either in my computer or in the software that could have devastating consequences if not caught.  I approach my computer and this software with great suspicion now, but that's probably a good thing.

What was I thinking? (edit/delete)

OK, I recently had one of those "What was I thinking?" moments, and it reminded me of something.  When my wife was pregnant with our first son she received a piece of advice that I found extraordinary.  It went like this, "Don't do anything once that you don't want to do forever."  Of course we had no kids at the time, and we didn't realize how relevent that would be one day.

Well, we made it through two boys without violating the "Don't do" policy, but then we got a dog.  It's amazing how relevent that same advice would have been if I had followed it with my dog.  While I was at a conference my wife and sons went to PetSmart and rescued a 115 lb Rottwieller.  He was called "Hoss."  He was so tall that his head was above our dining room table.  At 115 lbs he looked kind of skinny, but within a year he was 185 lbs, and then he looked a little like a large black tube with legs and a head.

Eventually, we got him on a better eating plan and he has slimmed down to a nice 145 lbs, and he looks healthy.  Now, here's where I violated the "Don't do" policy.  He is very smart.  So, we all have been teaching him tricks.  It really has been fun, and he plays along willingly.  One day he was standing at the kitchen doorway and I asked him, "What do you want?" I taught him how to walk in and tap his treat bag to let me know what he wanted.  He liked it because it ultimately ended in a treat.  He is very food motivated.  I thought it was cute, and I was very proud of our accomplishment.  Then, before I knew it, he had taken the new trick to the next level.  Instead of waiting for me to ask what he wanted he would come in and tap on his bag of treats.  Before I knew it, he was like a rock and roll drummer.  What I thought was fun and cute had turned into a nightmare.  He had to go back on his diet, and we measure the treats out from an undisclosed location now.

What does this have to do with real estate?  Clients can be like Hoss.  It is our responsibility to help our clients find the perfect house, get the best deal and ultimately walk away feeling like they had a good experience.  But, once some cleints learn that we know where the treat bag is, they start tapping.  What was once offered as an extra benefit or a simple favor for a client becomes an expectation with a commissin attached.  Most of my clients have been amazing, but every once in a while I get one that asks for a little extra, and then a little more, and a little more until they are dominating all of my time and keeping me from other more pressing and more profitable business.  I learned with the boys and Hoss that boundaries and balance keep us all happy and sane, and I have found that the same rules apply to real estate clients. So I leave this helpful advice, "Don't do anything once that you don't want to do forever."

Have a great sane and happy weekend.

Peanut Butter and Technology 

Late one night this week I was getting ready for bed, but my stomach was growling.  What could I eat that wasn't too heavy and was quick and easy?  Peanut butter.  I know, anything right before bed could lead to dragons and one-eyed sloths dragging me off for a midnight snack in my dreams, but the growling stomach was going to keep me awake anyway so it was worth the risk.  A quick sandwich and I was off to bed.  No dragons or one-eyed sloths, but a thought did come to mind.  Do you ever outgrow peanut butter?  I know, what does this have to do with real estate, right? 

I posted the question, "Do you ever outgrow peanut butter?" on my Facebook page.  I was surprised at the large response I received from my FB friends.  It's unanimous.  Peanut butter is a staple, and it's here to stay.  Now, what does this have to do with real estate?  It made me think of how we do business today.  I'm a techno-geek so I love all the electronic ways we conduct business today.  I love all of the smartphones, ipads, zooms, electronic lockboxes, drip campaigns, auto-responders, electronic signatures, etc., etc., etc.  But, the reality is that real estate still needs a good dose of peanut butter. 

The peanut butter of real estate is getting to know your client.  It's putting their needs first and making sure they find the best house at the best price.  It's protecting their interest and seeing that they are not taken advantage of by a buyer or seller.  In our electronic environment, the personal touch is still the glue that creates the deal.  No matter how tech-savvy we become, clients need contact, understanding and an advocate.  That's the peanut butter of real estate, and it's here to stay.  Now, if I can just figure out what the jelly is I'll be set.